Don’t stop…believin’…

I am stronger than this.

Today I ate each time I was hungry.  I exercised as I planned, no extra running snuck in for good measure.  I didn’t call myself cruel names and I didn’t blame my current little black rain cloud on my thighs.

What I have decided is this: I must learn to separate urges from symptoms.  At this point, I can’t help the urges.  I can’t help wanting to tabulate calories and I can’t help sighing over pants that get too tight, but I can choose not to act out in response to those urges. 

It’s only a symptom of my disordered habits if I act on it.  As long as it just stays in my head, then it’s just an echo. 

I’m not letting an echo tell me what to do.

Thank you all for your supportive comments and for not, you know, finding me and punching me in the head and telling me to get my act together, no matter how much I’m asking for it.

I promise I’m not giving up.